your baby would rather be gassy

than be burped with these.

Really???

...but what about the daytime?

We've gotcha covered during those lonely nights.
What's gonna get you through the day, you ask?

That's right!
A creepy, strap-on hug.

No Valentine?

No problem!

heartbreaker

...More like heart-breaking that a mother would do this
to her poor, sweet little boy!